I’m afraid to tell you

I am a little late to the game on this (but it’s ok because I was on a mini vacation) but one of my dear friends, Erika, was so brave and I do feel like we’re on this journey “together” that I should pipe in, too. Also, mega thanks to Jess for starting this movement and Ez for organzing and sharing everyone’s links. I’m so happy to be part of something bigger than myself and this little blog. And, I am huge fan of both Creature Comforts & Make Under My Life! 

Sidenote: I actually started this post over the weekend on the way home from NYC and I was telling Erika last night how afraid I was to hit “publish.” With her adamant, “just do it” and inspiration from Bonnie at Going Home to Roost (one of my must-read daily blogs and the crafter of my adorable deer tea towels), here it is. 

1. I feel like I am a failure as a business owner. Despite kinda having a business (Clementine Lime) I feel like I should’ve pushed it two years ago when it was new. When my business partner slowly left CL, I felt heartbroken, alone and almost broken. I felt like I didn’t have my friend, my confidant, and that other person to talk in a meeting when I had no idea what to say. I’m slowly getting my confidence back to bring CL to the place it needs to be- all by myself.

2. I still feel like I have no idea what the hell I’m talking about. Despite being a “classically trained marketer” since I was 16 and a diploma in the subject to prove it- my greatest fear with mine and Erika’s newest endeavor is that I’ll have nothing to talk about it. I often have to remind myself that I know more than the average person and my knowledge on the subject may be useful to others.

3. I love my “real” job. I am finally at a point where I am passionate about my day job (I do social media for my alma madder) and love going to work every day. I’m afraid because I love this job so much, I’ll never get to do my own thing full-time.

4. I feel so late to the game. That quote, “a year from now you’ll wish you started today” really rings true, and I tried to remind myself that all the time to stay motivated. Sometimes, I have to talk myself into the fact I am in a good place and in a good market and that I should just do it now.

But, sometimes I think about all the other talented designers/bloggers out there, and I just get overwhelmed and get so discouraged to start anything new. I should really just start though, right?

5. I’m jealous of my friends who left Providence after college and live in Boston, New York or Chicago. Sometimes I feel like I’m missing out, professionally and that I’m stuck. Again, then I think about the money I’m saving on rent and the fact I love living in Providence (it really is a great city) and have a great network here.